long after the rest of you has left me,
after i forget the way you smell,
and the color of your eyes,
the way your arms felt around me,
and the way you tilted your head back to laugh.
long after the rest of you has vanished your name will stay with me.
like a steady beat in the back of my mind,
like the constant drip of a faucet,
like the buzz of a fly in my ear,
like fingernails on a chalkboard.

you have long been gone from my heart, but your name continues to pop to mind when trying to recall a street name, or a song title.
and i've realized that i don't hate you for anything you did to me, or anything i did to you, or anything neither one of us did.
i hate you because when all is silent, your name is there like a the tick of a clock in an empty room.
counting the seconds, the minutes, the days, the weeks, the months,
eventually the years, of my loneliness.

9:53 p.m. - 2003-03-24

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