pouring forth, unorganized

today is beautiful.
perfect for walking outside and riding with car windows down.
my part of texas is gorgeous right now, and for a few weeks i will be a little less eager to escape.

i came home today and someone has pulled out some paintings i did in high school of a dear friend, who is now dying of cancer.
i can't even bring myself to go see him.

so i am still thinking of beauty and pain, and how they are connected, and how they balance one another out.

because, honestly, each was so intense today that i wouldn't have been able to bear it on it's own without having the other there to restore some sense of equilibrium.
i'm not sure if that should make sense, but somehow it does.
to me, at least.

4:51 p.m. - 2003-04-16

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